5 Weird Things Narcissists Do To Manipulate and How to Identify them

Javeria Gull
6 min readMay 19, 2022
5 Weird Things Narcissists Do To Manipulate
Photo by engin akyurt on Unsplash

Have you ever found yourself dealing with a narcissist? Chances are, you have probably encountered a narcissist at some point in your life. It is extremely difficult to deal with a narcissist as they can act extremely selfishly. We all have to deal with that at some point in life.

As you go through life, you will often find yourselves having to deal with people who seem to carry the utmost levels of egotism, haughtiness, and manipulative or perhaps even toxic behavior.

If you have seen the mentioned signs, you might be dealing with narcissists. Narcissists crave constant attention. They don’t appreciate criticism at all and instead could blame you for their toxic behaviors.

In fact, you could even be in an intimate relationship with a narcissist and not even realize it.

In this article, we will discuss how to identify a narcissist and some weird behaviors narcissists show.

First how to identify a narcissist?

Narcissism is a condition in which a narcissist needs an extreme need for attention and admiration. A narcissist is someone who is extremely self-absorbed and can be difficult to deal with. They are often selfish, vain, and egotistical. They often feel like they can never be wrong about anything or anybody.

They crave constant attention and admiration. They’re also insecure and need constant praise to feel good about themselves.

They have little empathy for others, except for those who can help them in some way. The worst part is that narcissists can often hide their true nature. Sometimes they can appear charming or witty — even likable — and they might have a lot of friends. But when they become challenged or feel threatened by someone else, they can become dangerous and feel the need to lash out at that person.

Also, a narcissist will never admit it if they are wrong about something and will always believe that they’re always right. They can be charming at times, but most people don’t realize how manipulative and demanding they can be.

The worst part is that a narcissist can hide in plain sight because they are able to put on a mask of “charm” in order to appear as someone who is fun and interesting to be around.

There are different types of narcissists though; vulnerable narcissists and malignant narcissists.

Vulnerable Narcissists might have anxiety problems and need a lot of attention while Malignant Narcissists are even more dangerous because they can be so charming while hiding their true nature underneath this mask.

Photo by Ismael Sanchez

A vulnerable narcissist is also extremely sensitive and needs constant attention. They are always the center of their own universe; they rarely think about anyone else or any problems that aren’t their own.

Self-importance, an excessive need for attention and admiration, and a lack of empathy are all signs of narcissism, which can make it difficult to have a relationship with someone who is narcissistic. Vulnerable narcissists are often harmless to others but have self-destructive tendencies.

Whereas a Malignant narcissist is someone who needs to be the center of attention and will go to great lengths to ensure that he or she always knows they are loved by others.

If you tell them about something good that happened to you, don’t be surprised if they try to one-up you by telling you about something better than what you told them. They need to have a “topper”. Now, you need to be careful with the malignant narcissists as they can put you in real danger easily if they feel threatened by you.

So, how can you figure out which narcissist you’re up against? Or even if you’re in the company of a narcissist?

5 Weird Things Narcissists Do To Manipulate

1. Turn the Conversation into Monologues

Don’t expect a narcissist to care about your bad day or something good that happened to you. Narcissists dominate conversations, turning them into one-way monologues.

If you have a conversation with a narcissist, you will find that they are not interested in what you have to say. If you tell them about something positive that happened to you, they will usually tell you about something better that happened to them… and then they will expect you to be impressed by this. But please remember that the situation will never be as bad as it could be.

If the narcissist is not getting the attention they desire from you, they will often try to dominate a conversation in order to feel more important. If they run out of ways to challenge your point of view, they may simply end the conversation quickly.

On these kinds of rare occasions, when a narcissist just goes silent. Just take it as a small victory and walk away.

2. Fascination with Dictators

Some narcissists may be more interested in dictators than others, but they are almost always fascinated by powerful leaders. Some of the world’s most notorious dictators include Nero and Hitler.

Narcissists tend to idolize dictators like Hitler who have harmed and killed many. Even if the narcissist does not approve of all the extreme actions of such dictators, they will most likely find a way to make justify such tyrannical conduct.

In other words, they will start victim blaming and victim shaming. According to a typical narcissist under these circumstances, the victim must have done something to deserve such horrible treatment.

3. Lack of Empathy

Narcissists tend to lack empathy and accountability. They often do not see the connection between their actions and the harm they cause others. For example, if a narcissist has cheated on you, they may be unconcerned that they hurt you or your relationship.

Lack of Empathy
Photo by RODNAE Productions

Another example is that a narcissist may accuse you of cheating when you attempt to speak with another person. Narcissists may also claim that you are too sensitive or overreacting when confronted about their toxic behavior.

4. Prevent You From Relaxing

Prevent You From Relaxing

Sometimes, narcissists will try to prevent you from relaxing or sleeping. For example, they may start a fight with you at night when you want to sleep or keep you awake by saying constantly hurtful things.

Narcissists may prevent you from relaxing, even when you need to rest. They may fight with you while you are trying to sleep or wake you up in the middle of the night.

Narcissists have a hard time accepting your need for time to yourself, so they may interfere with your ability to relax.

5. Exaggerating a Situation

Narcissists are likely to exaggerate any situation, turning molehills into mountains, and then making mountains seem like molehills.

Narcissists may exaggerate small issues and blow them out of proportion.

Narcissists tend to exaggerate minor issues, sometimes making them out to be much bigger than they really are.

Because most of the time they are trying to overcompensate for their own insecurities, it is common for people with narcissism to blow things out of proportion.

That’s why dealing with narcissists can be really draining both physically and mentally. If you have a narcissist in your life, just know that you are not alone in your struggle.

Now if you recognize signs of narcissism in someone, you have two choices: distance yourself or find ways to protect yourself. It may take some time to see the situation for what it is and decide how to react.

I hope this article has helped you identify the signs of narcissism and take steps to protect yourself from them. If you ever feel yourself in real danger, please immediately reach out to the professionals and the police for help.



Javeria Gull

Javeria is a developer, teacher, socialist, and author. She lives and breathes books. That’s why even after doing a degree in tech, work as a freelance writer.